THE BALLAD OF THE POWER POINT RANGER
(sung to the tune of “The Green Beret”)
Requests are made from day to day;
Briefings held and changes made.
Graphic slides, a must they say,
Power Point is the only way.
Computers crash and printers stall,
Overloading protocol.
Network’s down and soldiers cry
Briefing’s late, so heads will fly.
Pin Power Point slides upon my chest,
Full color slides, they look the best
100 slides were made that day
but only 10 made the final display.
Smiles upon the General’s face
Slides were done, looked really great
Was up all night really working late,
Just to hear the General say ....
My soldier son, your slides were great,
Briefing’s done, staff’s up to date,
One problem son, you took too long,
So put in one more change, then go on home.
So tell my Mom I done my best,
Pin Power Point slides upon my chest
100 slides were made that day,
but only 10 made the final display.
The Ballad of the Leatherneck Corps by Herman Wouk
Oh, the wind blows cold in Iceland but the
wind's blown cold before,
And it's not so hard in your own backyard
to be set for peace or war.
But to fight for right and freedom, and to
keep our honor clean,
We are proud to claim the title of United
States Marine.
Oh, the wind blows cold in Iceland but the
wind's blown cold before,
And it's not so hard in your own backyard
to be set for peace or war.
But to strike a blow on a distant foe is a
job for The LEATHERNECK CORPS.
Where are you heading Leatherneck?
I'm off to Tripoli son! It's someplace in
Africa, don't know where,
But an ornery pirate gang is there,
And we're under orders to sweep it bare of
each pirate son-of-a-gun.
So off they went, it was eighteen five,
And they piled in there with a mighty
drive 'Til hardly a pirate was left alive.
And, Jefferson said: "Well done."
Oh the shore is strange in Iceland,
But the shore's been strange before.
And the folks at home don't have to roam,
To be set for peace or war.
But to challenge fear when it's far from
here, Is a job for the LEATHERNECK CORPS.
Where are you heading, Leatherneck?
I'm off to Sumatra, son.
The natives there are a savage lot,
Our ships have been sunk, and our sailors
shot. And, that place which they tell me is
burning hot. It will be hotter before we're done.
So, off they went, back in thirty-two,
And vengeance was had for each murdered
crew and over the isle Old Glory Flew.
And Jackson said: "Well done."
Oh the sea is rough off Iceland,
But the sea's been rough before.
There are no rough seas where you sit at
ease. All set for peace or war.
But to face a foe half the world away,
Is a job for The LEATHERNECK CORPS.
Where are you heading Leatherneck?
I'm off to China, son!
A bunch of Boxers are raising hob,
They're killing Christians this crazy mob,
So the U.S. Marines have got a job
And this one looks like fun.
So in nineteen hundred they sailed away,
And fought the Boxers in old Cathay.
Pagodas crashed and they won the day.
And McKinley wired: "Well done."
Oh the gale roars high in Iceland,
But the gale's roared high before.
And it's cozy here, by the hearthside cheer,
To be set for peace or war.
But to make a stand, in a far off land,
Is a job for the LEATHERNECK CORPS!
Where are you heading Leatherneck?
I'm off to Iceland son!
There's trouble brewing across the map,
And it may or may not be our scrap,
But we ain't gonna wait til it's in our lap!
We'll head it off on the run!
So off they march at a soldier's pace,
And, we pray that they have no fight to face
But they've gone there anyway just in case.
And America says: "Well done."
Oh the nights may be long in Iceland,
But the nights been long before.
And it's not so hard in your own backyard,
To be set for peace or war.
But to beat the worst, by arriving first,
Is a job for The LEATHERNECK CORPS!