Bless you. I have been an evil SOB in my youth and hope I get forgiveness. If anyone can forgive my transgressions it is Jesus. It’s gonna take a lot to forgive my evil ways back in the day.
Jesus forgave the thief on the cross next to Him who was initially mocking Him, but soon repented, and the soldiers who crucified Him. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
He can certainly forgive you.
Paul was a pretty evil SOB, too, and David, the man after God’s own heart, murdered his most loyal servant and stole his wife. This is the reason Jesus came. We’re all evil SOBS. Don’t let Satan lie to you, but do understand what accepting Jesus’s sacrifice means beyond religion.