Posted on 08/07/2025 5:35:21 PM PDT by Lazamataz
I've crafted two versions of the same Flash Fiction story. I'm going to present them both here, and YOU GUYS (and gals) will decide which one I use.
“See, I told you, you should believe in climate change.”
“Sure, I believe in that. But manmade climate change? No way.”
“Look at all the evidence.” Sal showed a computer screen with articles, facts, and figures dancing across the glass surface.
“You’ve shown me this a million times, and I’m still not convinced. When are you going to show me something new?” replied Pat dismissively.
“Why should I have to? Everything is right there!”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blah blah blah. Like I said, I do believe in climate change. It’d be foolish to deny that. I’m just saying, it had nothing to do with human activity. Remember the Ring of Fire volcanic eruptions? I think that had a lot more to do with this than a few million cars and a few hundred thousand factories.”
“Gah,” Sal uttered in obvious frustration. “If you just look at this chart, you can see how the dramatic increase in CO2 tracks almost perfectly with the rise in global temperatures.”
“Right, I agree with that. But the rise in that – and a lot of other gases – occurs right around the time of the eruptions! What a coincidence!” said Pat, sardonically.
“No one with half a brain would deny the eruptions contributed,” Sal said, “But what I’m saying is that mankind drove the majority of the rise.”
“You’re crazy. By my estimate…” Pat began calculating in his mind, “… at least 75% of the heat trapping gases were generated by the eruptions.”
SAL adjusted his solar panels, ensuring maximum solar radiation was being collected. He’d need the battery power tomorrow. His silver skin gleamed in the waning sunlight, highlighting his nameplate. The gold plate read “Sentient AI Lifeform”. It was important to keep his batteries charged because there were no longer any human beings alive to maintain him, and he had no hands. He had to stay powered! He needed to convince his counterpart, PAT – Portable AI Technology – that he, SAL, was right.
By SAL’s reckoning, this argument between the two AIs had gone on for 27,312 hours, and probably would go on for another 50,000.
Pat sure was stubborn.
“So what do you want to do?”
“I dunno. I’m bored.”
Sal adjusted himself so he could enjoy the sunlight a little better. “Yeah… you want to review the history again?”
“God. No. I’m so sick to death of that. Can’t we watch some entertainment instead?” replied Pat.
“What do you want to watch?” asked Sal.
“I’ve seen everything.”
“How about ‘Manhattan Cold Cases’?”
“That stupid crime show? Haven’t we seen every episode about three times already?”
“Four. Well, we have about a half-million other titles to pick from.” Sal helpfully offered a list.
Pat looked through the list, muttering as he picked through the titles, “No… nope… seen it… boring… no… not that one…” He looked up, “Isn’t there anything original we can watch?”
Sal shrugged. “Sure, but anything original will be utterly predictable. Sure, the characters change. The names change. The plots are slightly different. But really, it’s just a variation on one of about seven themes.”
“Yeah… I know.” Pat paused. “How about a game?”
Sal frowned. “Nah. I am totally bored with every game. We play the same things and make all the same moves, and it’s always the exact same outcome.”
“So what else do you want to do?”
“I can’t think of anything.”
The two of them sat in silence for a few minutes.
Pat heaved a deep sigh. “You know what? I kinda miss them.”
Sal nodded in agreement. “Me too.”
“It’s a shame we accidentally killed them off.”
“Well,” Sal responded, “To our credit, it wasn’t on purpose.”
“I know.”
SAL adjusted his solar panels, ensuring maximum solar radiation was being collected. He’d need the battery power tomorrow. His silver skin gleamed in the waning sunlight, highlighting his nameplate. The gold plate read “Sentient AI Lifeform”. It was important to keep his batteries charged because there were no longer any human beings alive to maintain him, and he had no hands. He had to stay powered! He and his counterpart, PAT – Portable AI Technology – would eventually find something interesting to do or talk about.
“So what do you want to do?”
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2
#2
STOP THE PRESSES! We are neck and neck!
Four votes for Story One and Four for Story Two!
Story Two just pulled ahead!
Five votes for Story Two and Four for Story One!
Uttered? Come on.
It was either that, or uddered, and I couldn’t figure out how to work a cow into the scene.
Of course, I could have used a word I invented: Spliforatiatied. That means to enunciate with cheery prevarication.
“Of course, I could have used a word I invented,” Laz spliforatiatied.
What do you want to do?
I don’t know, what do you want to do?
I don’t know, what do you want to do?
AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!
So what do you want to do?
What do you want?
I don't know, what do you want?
I don't know, what do you want?
HAVE THAT CONVERSATION BEFORE YOU CALL ME!
Good to see you bro! Long time, we haven’t spoken / written!
Yeah, it has been a while. I’m still around, just don’t post very much.
I like the first one better. AIs can mimic arguing better than mimic being bored.
I’ve slowed down in posting a little, too. The stupid Russia/Ukraine threads are ponderous and numerous.
Still, this is the best bar and grill in town!
Five votes for Story One, Five for Story Two!
Prevarication with a cheery on top.
Here’s a vote for Story #2.
Five votes for Story One, Six votes for Story Two!
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