Anyway, you’re supposed to boil broccoli till it’s completely soft with a little salt and butter. Kills listeria and tastes better.
Only a jackass eats it crunchy. And they get a lot of gas.
It’s 97 cents a pound at Safeway till tomorrow. Safe? Already ate some.
I ain’t afraid of cancer... I had broccoli for lunch.
Broccoli kills cancer! A lot of people don’t know that; it’s not out yet. It’s true. You find out you got some cancer...(click) get yourself a bowl of broccoli. That’ll wipe it right out in a day or two.
Cauliflower too; cauliflower kills the really big cancers. The ones you can see through clothing from across the street.
Broccoli kills the little ones. The ones that are slowly eating you away from inside while your goofy, half-educated doctor keeps telling you, “You’re doing fine, Jim.”
In fact, bring your doctor a bowl of broccoli. He’s probably got cancer too. Probably picked it up from you. They don’t know what their doing. It’s all guesswork in a white coat.
-George Carlin