At 0530, as I was poking the stove to life and adding a stick of wood, I wondered how far away is the time I would not longer be able to do that simple thing. I wonder that about a lot of things that have been familiar and savored routine for many years. Even if I had a lot more money I would probably choose not to do a lot or anything different but buy some help to keep things going when I can't. Within the span of my control I am content with life keeping it as uncomplicated as possible. I know I am never alone though but I am guilty to forget the company I have.
There are so many things to wonder and helplessly worry about in the wind down. Some you can do a little about but many are out of your control or even influence. We kids took care of Mom and Dad's pets until they died of old age, fire took care of the house and many of their things five years ago now. So many of us now though have nobody or few to follow us or to distribute our things to who even want them.
I spend most of my sleepless worry time about who is going to take care of my wife and my pets that outlive me. The cows will be sold, the farm liquidated but my pets have known nothing but this farm and me taking care of them. I miss the ones already gone but I figured I would outlive them, not so much with my young ones now. Silly I know but there it is, one of my biggest worries.
Not a pleasant thought this Sunday morning. There are better things to think on and the coming frigid weather to prepare for. Time to feed the critters, pack in some wood for the box and then Bible study. Phillipians 4 may be a good place for today though I try to read through and not skip around too much.
8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
That is my problem and one that I think a lot of social scientists haven’t thought much about. What do you do when get too old to do things you know how to do? I’m reaching that stage. I have years of experience and knowledge on how things work and how to fix stuff. The problem is many of those things I can’t physically do anymore. I don’t have the strength, the flexibility or the energy to do them. My parents reached that point in life like we all do, but they had me and my siblings to do them for them. They had us to pay for small things they needed like a new water heater or the boys replacing their roof. I’m 73 and childless. I have no one to come over on the weekends to help dad. I did yard work, plumbing and electrical, put in window AC units, etc., for my parents and in-laws. I have no one like that to depend on or ask help of. So, I pay people to do things I used to be able to do. It is a cost that I don’t think is figured in by most financial planners when working with older individuals. Plumbers, electricians and HVAC people don’t work cheap.
The idea of staying active and socially involved is great, but the real problems I think are more centered on just general day to day living. There is a part of me that hopes to live until 93 like my mom, but there is another part of me that’s scared to death of that prospect.
I will be thinking on your words for a while. I will probable even read some of your post to my wife.
I will also pray for you and those in your care.