Reverse the genders and that would have been me up to my 38th birthday.
At some point, long before that age, you probably just lost interest in the "dating game" and/or "checked out." Maybe your career took precedence. Maybe you were too engrossed in community service, volunteering for the church, or helping out at the local animal shelter. Perhaps you found fulfillment in that.
Men can sense when a woman isn't "emotionally available" and will then usually not bother to pursue, even when the woman is physically attractive and has a nice personality.
I guess that it didn't really dawn on you what you had (more or less willingly) foregone until after your child-bearing years. But at least you aren't bitter or blaming anyone else for your situation. You can still lead a purposeful life and at least provide support to nephews and nieces. Further, if your health is still holding out, you could still look about in your retirement community or nursing facility and find a good man with whom to form an emotional bond.
Regards,
I’ve been widowed for 17 months.
My narcissistic husband crushed me to the point that I truly believed I was
“ lucky” he even put up with me.
Haven’t t been touched in decades.
If a person touches me I flinch.
If my friend hugs me I freeze up and barely tolerate it.
I’m actually terrified of the thought of a man in my life.
Who would want me?
I’m too broken now.
Sadly I need a man to help me do the helpful, strong and brave things men do.
Now more than ever.
I have no self esteem left.
Sometimes I feel like I’m not real at all.