Terrors of the Michelle Obama (Presidential) Prophecy

JohnKassNews ^ | 01/26/2024 | John Kass

[simpson96]

The world is not just about snuggling with housebroken puppies and rainbows out your window and riding unicorns bareback. The real world can be terrifying. Just ask former First Lady Michelle Obama.

She’s trembling with terror like a princess in a fairy tale being chased by Baba Yaga. And this terror of hers has infected the American news media with even more terror. Which brings us to the Michelle Obama Prophecy.

First, please understand that Michelle is terribly afraid that former President Donald Trump will recapture the White House. Her husband’s “Big Guy,” also known as China Joe Biden is haplessly watching his job approval ratings plummet especially in the swing states that will take other Democrat politicians down with him.

So they’re afraid, the media is afraid, and Michelle is pushing the panic button.

“I am terrified about what could possibly happen,” Ms. Obama said of this year’s presidential election on a podcast. And China Joe’s failing popularity numbers on key policy issues from the wide-open border to inflation to street crime are causing Democrat politicians to fret and as their leftist corprate media mouthpieces soil themselves.

Listen: The Chicago Way w/John Kass & Jeff Carlin: RCP’s Tom Bevan looks at DeSantis’ campaign blunders, the ‘Veep primary’ in New Hampshire, and what about M.O.? – John Kass (johnkassnews.com)

I’m worried too, and though I am definitely not a Democrat, I do worry, since the Obamas are world-class cynical phonies capable of anything. And now the JoBama administration is going on its third term, the panic at the potential loss of a fourth term may cause them to grab for five terms, completely trashing the Constitution.

But are the Democrats really terrified about trashing the Constitution in their never-ending power grab? No. Would Michelle opt to protect the Constitution and risk her own ambition? No.

“Because our leaders matter,” said the ‘terrified’ Michelle. “Who we select, who speaks for us, who holds that bully pulpit — it affects us in ways that sometimes I think people take for granted,” she said when asked to name some of her greatest fears.

Terrified, Michelle? I’m terrified that you are taking me for granted. You don’t speak for me, bless your heart.

The Obamas never say anything by accident. Words are their weapons. Joe Biden is sinking in the polls. And they have to do something, because China Joe is their meat puppet and they compelled him to accept Cackling Kamala as vice president.

Michelle understands raw clout as the daughter of a Chicago Democratic Machine precinct captain. But is she really terrified? Oh, please.

Don’t be such a chumbolone.

You’d think she’d be fearful of the Democrats losing the border to the control of the brutal Mexican drug cartels that smuggle in truckloads of fentanyl, the Chinese-made poison finished in Mexico that has killed 100,000 young Americans in the past year.

But she’s not. Biden and the Democrats lost the border to the cartels and the American people know it.

Or perhaps Michelle would be terrified that her crime-ridden hometown of Chicago overrun with illegal migrants—draining taxpayer resources for police, housing and schools for minority Chicago residents—prompting black Chicago voters to blame the one man completely responsible, Barack Obama’s ally and former Vice President Joe Biden. But the Obamas don’t have to worry about being crowded out by illegals. They live in Martha’s Vineyard, where illegal migrants were booted out.

You think Michelle would be terrified that Hillary Clinton is now linking herself to Barbie, which is enough to make Bill—and me and every other American male–stab his eyes out with a spork. Clinton’s latest hashtag, #HillaryBarbie, is revolting. Hillary you lost 2016 when you called half the country “deplorables.” It wasn’t the Russians that cost you, sweetie. It was you.

And you might think she’d be worried about power corrupting people, the way she herself was corrupted, torturing a ravenously hungry Oprah with hints of delicious White House pie, without offering Oprah any. How cruel. Even Gayle noticed.

“And oddly enough, Michelle mentioned that the White House cooks made the best pie in the world. But she didn’t offer Oprah or Gayle any…It made both Oprah and Gayle very uncomfortable, which may have been the idea. Oprah struck back by asking Michelle whether she and the president were still fighting a lot. Taken aback by such a personal question, Michelle stumbled, then finally managed to say that the marital arguing had been a ‘growth point’ in their relationship.”

But when it came to the Obamas, the media was not critical in the least. There is nothing so malleable as white liberal elitist journalists afraid of being called racists. So they sucked up and liked it. It was as if they were addicted to smoking Hopium, and I said so repeatedly, the Jacobin frenzy turned to hatred. But I get it. Hopium smokers just hate it when you mention that they’re addicted.

You know what should be terrifying Michelle Obama? That the Obama legacy is a dumpster fire.

I don’t put too much stock in polls or Michelle Obama fairy tales written by fawning Hopium-smoking and corrupt corporate media that treated Barack Obama as a gentle forest creature from the Narnia stories.

I remember the Obamas as silky phonies who rode corruption (and Tony Rezko) and they rode Oprah and the rest of the media up the ladder and ignored the city that needed them.

And I remember that last November in the mid-term elections, and that promise of a big red Republican wave that didn’t happen. The big red wave broke on abortion and disappeared. But that’s politics.

Black Democrats in particular feel betrayed and as their children are evicted from schools and parks they make angry noises about bolting from the Democrat Party which will only get worse once cities like Chicago build tent cities to house the illegals and cut deeply into social service budgets to appease them.

Millions of illegal immigrants have flooded across Biden’s non-existent border—10,000 a day—overwhelming the cities with demands for housing and services and bringing a torrent of narcotics.

All this has given new life to the Michelle Obama prophecy.

My friend Tom Bevan–co-founder and president of Real Clear Politics–first uttered the Michelle prophecy years ago, about the time I was mocking myself with the notion I should run for mayor of Chicago as a portly Greek Spartacus. I bet Bevan a steak dinner. We talked about his prophecy this week when he was a guest on the Chicago Way podcast with Jeff Carlin and me. I hope you click on the link here and listen.

He thinks if she seeks the Democratic nomination, and Barack gives her the green light, no Democrat can stop her. You couldn’t stop a Gorgon with a little hand mirror either. A Michelle candidacy would unleash the flesh eating harpies, also known as the AWFULs (Angry White Female Leftist Suburbanites) and no amount of Holy Water could protect us.

I think that if Michelle secures the nomination, she should select former Harvard president Claudine “The Plagiarist” Gay as the White House press secretary.

I think I just might have to make a reservation at a superb Chicago steakhouse.

Biden is failing, especially in the key swing states.

“We had a poll come out in Michigan the other day and he’s down like eight points,” said Bevan. “And these are scary, scary numbers for Democrats, and the longer they continue the more I think you will hear about Michelle Obama. And the reason you’ll continue to hear about her because she’s the only answer to the question of ‘Who else?'”

Biden can drool all over his ties and look vaguely into space but they couldn’t dare replace him because that would mean the ascension of Kamala Harris to the presidency, and that would mean the end of the world. But a Michelle Obama could obliterate Kamala’s idiotic ambition as an identity politics totem, because Michelle could take her off the board and the Democrat political logic still holds.

Michelle’s Black Queen takes Kamala’s Black Queen of All Word Salads.

“Because, you know, Gavin Newsom doesn’t do it, JB Pritzker doesn’t do it,” Bevan said. “There’s nobody else, and it’s certainly not Kamala Harris. And that’s the problem. Michelle Obama is the only one who could come in and be coronated in Chicago in July or whatever the convention’s gonna be. And every Democrat around the country would be like, Yep, I get it. I’m on board’. There would be no, you know, even Kamala’s folks would have to be like, yeah, you know, ‘OK, fine.’ Because any other answer gonna have hurt feelings and you’re going to have a tear in the Democrat coalition just weeks before the presidential election. That is gonna be a real problem for for Democrats getting out their voters and so she’s the answer guys.”

And no one could stop her with the broken corporate media so besotted and in love with the Obamas.

To keep my sanity I think I’ll find a Hopium pipe and fill a bowl, curl up and hope China Joe hangs on until November.

[HYPOCRACY]

Big Mike would be too tough to handle for his muzzie and Chinese masters. And especially for his wife Baracka.

[Vaduz]

Michelle Obama has nothing of worth to offer just a blacker Harris.