Count me in as one who advocates just letting him sit there glued to the floor, utterly ignoring him, and let him figure his own way out of the situation.
I’ve read that, long ago, one of the punishments for pickpockets was to nail their ear to a pillory and leave them there to be heckled. The only way to free themselves was to rip their ear from the nail - which they’d eventually do, once they become desperate enough. Seems like we could apply a similar technique here. We wouldn’t even need nails since they’ve essentially nailed their ears themselves.