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Garland Appoints Special Counsel To Cover Up Biden's Crimes
The Babylon Bee ^ | Aug 11, 2023

Posted on 08/11/2023 10:09:37 AM PDT by McGruff

In a press conference today, Attorney General Merrick Garland announced he will be appointing a new special counsel, David C. Weiss, to investigate the Biden's and then cover up all their crimes.

"I have given Mr. Weiss full power and authority to investigate Hunter Biden and the Biden family. We must conduct a thorough investigation so we can know which crimes to sweep under the rug," said Garland. "After a thorough inquiry, Mr. Weiss will be in charge of destroying all evidence, bringing no serious charges, and granting Hunter Biden immunity forever. He is a man of the utmost integrity and I trust him to do this job to the best of his ability."

The new Special Council will be given access to all damning evidence of corruption and bribery against the President, which he will retain and then destroy. All remaining witnesses will then be invited to a surprise paddle-boarding party at the President's beach estate.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Conspiracy
KEYWORDS: true
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To: null and void; aragorn; EnigmaticAnomaly; kalee; Kale; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; bitt; ...

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21 posted on 08/11/2023 11:04:45 AM PDT by bitt (<img src=' 'width=40%>)
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To: McGruff

It can’t be satire when it is true.


22 posted on 08/11/2023 11:09:48 AM PDT by ConservativeInPA (The Delay Trump’s trial, delay. Elect Trump President. Trump pardons himself. )
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To: McGruff

Writing articles as satire is the last method available under the first amendment to report truth.


23 posted on 08/11/2023 11:11:49 AM PDT by ConservativeInPA (The Delay Trump’s trial, delay. Elect Trump President. Trump pardons himself. )
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To: McGruff
If the Bee had just stopped before completing their first sentence:

In a press conference today, Attorney General Merrick Garland announced he will be appointing a new special counsel, David C. Weiss, to investigate the Biden's.

That alone would tell you that it's satire.

24 posted on 08/11/2023 11:50:03 AM PDT by Tell It Right (1st Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: All

Cong Matt Gaetz got it right
<><>says that the House should demand Smith appear before the Congress
<><>require Smith to “give a transcribed interview to House Judiciary in the next 15 days”
<><>or face a subpoena
<><>if Smith ignores the subpoena, Congress should hold him in criminal contempt.
<><> so if AG Garland refuses to support the Congress’ contempt referral,
<><>Garland will have made himself vulnerable to impeachment.


25 posted on 08/11/2023 12:08:13 PM PDT by Liz (More tears are shed over answered prayers than over unanswered ones. St Teresa of Avila)
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To: McGruff

Yes.

Plausible deniability.

They can claim non-partisanship.


26 posted on 08/11/2023 12:11:46 PM PDT by ifinnegan (Democrats kill babies and harvest their organs to sell)
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To: McGruff

Truth.


27 posted on 08/11/2023 12:56:08 PM PDT by GOPJ (Companies that only advertise on MSNBC but won't advertise on FOX or NWSMX are 'bud light' companies)
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To: gattaca
“At publishing time, President Biden had thanked the Special Council for his outstanding service to the nation and wired him some bribe money.”

You're right - powerful...

28 posted on 08/11/2023 12:58:42 PM PDT by GOPJ (Companies that only advertise on MSNBC but won't advertise on FOX or NWSMX are 'bud light' companies)
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To: McGruff

Weiss has already proven he can’t be trusted.


29 posted on 08/11/2023 1:32:08 PM PDT by TBP (Decent people cannot fathom the amoral cruelty of the Biden regime.)
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