When I first got back from Vietnam, I bought my first conure and he and I bonded immediately. He was however, a severe biter of any adult he considered a threat. My ex-wife used to get along with him, but she would throw his cage (with him in it) down the stairs when she was mad at me - and from then on, he stayed locked in his cage whenever she was home, or he would become a flying pair of pliers going after her.
He was dangerous to stranger, large dogs, cats and his main sport (I would let him fly outside and he would always come home) was diving on cats and dogs and making them yelp. He would never bite kids, or puppies or kittens, no matter what they did to him.
I've got three of them now and they are a hoot - messy, noisy, and chew everything if I don't provide them with toys that they can tear up. At night, I just say "time to go to bed" and they fly back to their cage, get in and wait for me to close the door.
Wow, your ex was messed up.