I’m old and don’t have much to lose. In our church’s plan for an active threat, my task is to go straight at the threat. I’m no help if taken out too easily, but I’m going to get close enough to be a problem for anyone but a well trained gunman. I readily volunteered for this role and have the proper mindset. Whether Jesus approves of my attitude is another matter.
If we had more men willing to accept that role as you have, we wouldn’t have these kinds of problems.
The Left is trying to “engineer” those qualities out of men.
What you have volunteered for is out of love for your brothers and sisters in Christ, even if it means losing your life in the pursuit of bringing order to chaos.
It is the mindset of a peacemaker.