Yeah I'm with you. That's where good design comes in. You can go modern without the cold look. The Arts and Crafts movement accomplished that at the beginning of the 20th century. They did it by combining natural materials with minimalist lines. Stainless steel appliances within that context look good because it's complementary not overwhelming.
Frank Lloyd Wright was a master of that and I've visited Falling Water a few times looking for design ideas (steal from the best!)