Interesting. Presume that you are divorced too. One theory is that if your wife passed away, and you had a good marriage, there is a chance you would have stayed more conservative / traditional in your dating as a widower.
Knew a very attractive woman not too long ago who dated one guy (high school sweet heart), married, kids, became unhappy in marriage after 30 years. She took the initiative left and claimed to be separated (still legally married) 3+ years later. She wanted to be courted the old fashioned way BUT was looking for the right guy to have a “friends with benefits” relationship. She felt she missed out on dating in her younger years.
Her complaint - guys would take her out to a restaurant, then right after dinner - straight up ask her to go to her place to have sex. She felt cheap. That’s what she missed out in the 1970s ... making up for lost time ain’t all it is cracked up to be. It’s a slippery slope. Back then, as now, one who plays the free-sex field (or marital cheating) will eventually meet the date from hell. There are some movies that capture this situation quite well.
I’m mid 50’s, widowed 3 years ago, and my wife essentially lost all interest in sex the last 5 or so years of our marriage. When she passed, I connected with a couple of former girlfriends for a year or so, and have decided that nope, I’m done. I’m too old to retrain anyone to put up with me. Happier by myself.
If you don't ask you don't get.