One of my favorite Dennis Miller rants:
And exactly when did stewardesses in this country get so f_cking
cranky? I know it’s a tough job — there’s got to be a thousand
different ways to tie that neckerchief, but why piss on me, huh? You
know, the worst thing about it is they don’t even come clean with you
and tell you how much they hate you. They treat you with that highly
contrived air of mock civility, that tight, pursed-lip grin where they
nod agreement with everything you say. You know right behind that
face plate they barely tolerate your very existence. I’d rather they
just come out in the open and say, “Hey, listen, _sshole: when I was
eighteen years old, I made a horrible vocational error, all right? I
turned in my entire adult life for cheap airfare to Barbados. Now
I’ve got hair with the tensile strength of Elsa Lanchester in ‘Bride
of Frankenstein.’ I haven’t met Mr. Right. I’m a waitress in a bad
restaurant at thirty thousand feet. Jam your Diet Slice up your _ss,
all right?” At least show me something. Come down the aisle like the
old broad in ‘From Russia with Love’ with the knife point coming out
of her shoe. “Peanuts, Mr. Bond?”
(I’m a waitress in a bad
restaurant at thirty thousand feet.)
🤣🤣🤣😜
Perfect. I think I’ve heard that bit before. I’ve seen a few of these aging losers purposely slam that 900 lb drink buggy into sleeping passengers knees and seen the look of rabid anger and fear as well when other passengers in the vicinity got in her face for doing that. Of course her response was threatening to snitch everyone off to the bus driver and auto pilot monitor in the barricaded flight deck. United is the worst followed by American. But again, fly an international carrier like Fiji Air Air China or Iberia Air on a long trip and it’s likely, if they like you, to get invited to the rear at 12am when they break out the mini bottles in a private party when everyone else is snoozing. Happened to me a few times :)