From The Arkansas Gazette
4 minutes good
3 minutes excellent
2 minutes exceptional
90 seconds superior
Master, why are you punishing me? I was predestined to disobey you.
And I was predestined to punish you.
SXTNOHJ PXGJU NX WKGJ UPKBBJTU NX NCXUJ AKNC AXXEJH PJWU, ZHE WPXGJU NX NCXUJ AKNC HX CZHEU. —NCJXBCKPJ WZONKJT
Solution to previous puzzle (select the yellow text with your cursor to read):
FORTUNE LOVES TO GIVE SLIPPERS TO THOSE WITH WOODEN LEGS, AND GLOVES TO THOSE WITH NO HANDS. —THEOPHILE GAUTIER
HAL'S CRYPTOGRAM HELPER
Could we call this one a mysterious paradox?