“If it didn’t work for you it’s because of insufficient will to follow through.”
Horseshit! Spent 50 years of my life dieting based on calories. I could lose weight...but not always fat. Got down to 125 lbs (5’8”) and still had a thick layer of belly fat. Could lose weight but at the cost of feeling weak and having severe headaches. And when my diet ended, I’d gain weight back.
4 years ago I went Keto and started time restricted eating. If your early eating patterns get your insulin out of whack, you need to go from insulin resistant to insulin sensitive again or you will NOT lose belly fat.
I’m now nearly on a carnivore diet. I had no trouble losing weight and keeping it off. I have more energy and at 155 lbs can see my belt buckle - and I can live like this for the rest of my life. No headaches. No feeling weak as a kitten.
Gary Taubes has it right: If your hormones aren’t out of whack, calories in/out works. But if your hormones are out of whack, you need to address the hormonal imbalance or a diet won’t work. Sorry but I’ve spent 50 years trying low-fat diets with repeated failure. I’ve now finally, in my 60s, found something that WORKS! And no, I do not in any way count calories. I don’t give a rat’s rear about calories. I eat lots of protein, lots of fat, and restrict my carb intake. And now my BODY is regulating my weight correctly.
I don’t have to pay attention to calories because my body’s weight regulation system in back on track. My BODY takes care of my weight. All I have to do is eat most of my meals between noon and 6 pm and emphasize protein and fat. Bread will kill me. Rarely eat veggies and never fruits. Flee from sugar. But I can eat all the fat and protein I want - and my body takes care of the rest!
It sounds like you may have developed Metabolic syndrome which is a number of conditions that occur together and eventually become life threatening. I am very glad that you found a solution that worked for you. You are correct that once thing get completely out of whack, and hormones can be a big part of that, the traditional way of thinking about losing weight can become almost futile.