Sign on door: “EXTREME DANGER! EBOLA QUARANTINE. STAY BACK 100+ FEET”
or ...
No sign, Answer door with V-8 juice in your mouth. Cough it all over them then explain, while coughing violently, that you’re under quarantine for Ebola and the health dept. was supposed to put up a sign but they forgot in their hurry to leave.
Your posting has possibilities...
V8 juice could be substituted for alka seltzer tablets foaming in one’s mouth...”Yup just got the shot yesterday...don’t know why i’m drooling at the mouth and would like to eat your brains...”!