We have the reverse situation!
My wife and I are close to 70, so the kids are raised and on their own. We have lived on the San Francisco Peninsula in a small town since 1983. My wife is a native Californian from the East Bay. Like many people, we are dismayed by the insanity of one-party Democrat government as well as the over-growth of our town by developers and the constant pressure from Sacramento to build our “fair share” of low-income housing. We both worked hard to get where we are and live in a nice town with single family homes. Now the Dems are working on bills to let people build two homes o quarter-acre lots AND two attached ADUs AND two detached ADUs. That would be six houses in a quarter acre. We are absolutely fed up.
During our travels the past 25 years, we always looked at places and asked ourselves “would we like to retire here?” We visited my aunt and uncle in Twin Falls, ID many times. They had lived in Ketchum, ID (Sun Valley area) for almost 40 years before returning to Twin. We liked Ketchum a lot, but there weren’t enough year-round people for us.
One year I took my wife up to the Idaho Panhandle where my mom was born and my grandparents had retired in the 60s. My wife immediately fell in love with the area around Coeur d’Alene so we started taking more add-on trips there after visiting my Uncle in Twin (my aunt had now passed). We loved the beauty, the conservatism, the friendliness of everybody, the politeness of the kids, the natural beauty, the lakes, and lots more.
We found a nice house near a lake and, after a lot of soul searching, bought it as a second home three years ago. I thought we were buying it as a summer place and we would winter in California. We are fortunate we could keep the California house. I spent a good part of two years in Idaho doing a lot of renovation and improvements (I’m retired).
In March 2020, my wife was planning a week-long ski trip to our Idaho place when COVID hit. Her work shut down and told everybody to work remotely, so she grabbed the dog and drove up to Idaho. She’s been here 14 months now and has made a LOT of new friends here. We joined a nearby country club with a “social membership” (no golf privileges) and met a lot of people that way. My wife learned how to play pickleball and plays at the local gym most days of the week during the winter and on the outdoor courts at the club in the summer. She became great friends of a neighbor’s wife (I had met her husband earlier) and got invited to a lot of dinner parties. We’ve become good friends with a lot of neighbors and have had lots of dinner parties. There are five ski resorts within an hour of hour place, and season ticket prices are cheap. My wife bought new ski gear and went skiing with friends several times this winter. She made some good friends at the local dog park where she takes our doggy to run and play. She’s gone hiking, biking and walking with a friend she met there. Our kids’ preschool teacher in California is from Idaho and introduced us to some of her sorority sisters from the U of I and my wife became good friends with one of the gals. We’ve been to their new house on Lake Coeur d’Alene several times and had them over.
I spent the winter in California helping our daughter remodel the house she bought in the Bay Area and doing deferred maintenance on our California house.
My wife retires at the end of June and she has to be in her office in California the last three weeks of June to train her replacement. We will both be there for the three weeks. Then she says that, on July 1, we are driving to Idaho and she will never return to California again.
As you can see, my wife is really outgoing and makes friends easily. I am really thrilled she loves Idaho so much.
So we are working to figure out how to manage retirement together. She is 100% committed to being a full-time Idahoan. She has never loved a place more than here. We may rent out the CA house or sell it. Or maybe keep it as a winter retreat for me, at least for a while. Our original plans to be Idaho snowbirds went up in smoke when she discovered how much she loves Idaho.
I am as disgusted with CA and it’s vile politics as anybody, but it’s been home for me for nearly 50 years and it’s hard to say good bye to our hometown, the beauty and mild winters.
We will figure it out. Fortunately, the kids are grown so we don’t have that constraint. Good luck to you and your wife. Perhaps my story will give you both inspiration and food for thought.
I am truly blessed that my wife fell in love with North Idaho so much and is thrilled to be here.
I guess this touched so many important areas (location wise that mean so much to me.) But also I love the gorgeousness of SB as well as the ability to be athletic outdoors years round with lots of mountains and water sports. Also I love the small town vibe and chillness of SB.
But I'm very concerned about the new changing of the single family home, real estate laws as well as the huge increase in ADUs. I love the privacy of where I live close to the city and have worked hard for the gorgeous home and privacy that I have so close within the city. It is a huge concern.
So thank you for sharing your story. I've been looking for possible alternatives to California. But hesitant to leave the ocean and mountain combo. But you reminded me there are some wonderfully places that I have had a lot of fun that are both wonderful athletically as well as very beautiful, water oriented, but also with gorgeous mountains.
Amazing you two are still skiing. Incredible!! I hope my knees are that incredible at close to 70 :D.
Prayers to you and your family as well as for all the decisions to make over time around your housing.