Take one of those pies, stuff it into a haggis and let her rip!
The first thing you have to get is that "tea" is not tea [with cucumber sandwhiches and pastry] in UK unless you are in a highclass establishment. It's a late afternoon snack break often provided by employers to employees. You can have a can of beans for tea.
We don't actually speak the same language. We just think we do.