Back in the day, because I did the photo finishing for one PD, I was treated to the odd funny true crime story.
One was from out of Topeka, which apparently at the time had a high density of convenience stores, and was from the outskirts of town.
A fellow wearing a ski mask and brandishing a gun entered one and demanded the cash. The clerk proclaimed that company policy was to give him everything he wanted and not to even try to look a5 his face. As he emptied the cash drawer he asked if the man wanted him to count it so he would know how much he was getting. He said yeah but then said don’t bother with the change after the quarters had been counted.
At this point the clerk wrote the total down on a gas receipt.
The robber signed it, took his copy and left.
After locking up the clerk called the cops and asked if the guy had a record.
Oh, yeah, long one the cop assured.
Well, I’ve got a signed confession here for armed robbery...
...Well, I’ve got a signed confession here for armed robbery...
Very funny.
I heard of a goofball who wrote a stick up note on one of his deposit slips from the same bank he was trying to rob.
Then there was the guy who put a trash bag on his head, went into a bank and announced a stick up. He forgot to cut eyeholes in the bag. Struggled a bit while the off duty cop subdued him.
And the winner is:
A fellow chained his rear bumper of his pick up to an ATM machine. He was going to pull it out of the wall and make off with a big haul. His bumper fell off with the rear license plate on it. It took law enforcement about 15 minutes to find his address. Popo shows up and there is the truck missing its rear bumper.
One of the greatest low-level crime stories I’ve ever heard. Theft generously treated as purchase. WOW.