I couldn’t disagree with you more about negative reinforcement. Love and reinforcement of what’s right ALWAYS trumps criticism. Always. However, it requires parents spending the time to teach their children what’s right, discussing with them why it is right, and leading by example. I also strongly believe that giving a child a start in spirituality is crucial.
I do agree with you about parental responsibility.
why do you associate negative reinforcement with ‘criticism’?.
Negative reinforcement is the basis for personal accountability. It can be an immediate reaction or a withdrawal of services. A swat on the diaper and stern words for a toddler incapable of a conversation about cars, or the 6yo who has no real grasp of death who puts the kitty in the dryer to ‘make it fluffier!’ For teens, whose brains are still developing synapses, it’s grounding. No tv, no car, no internet. Having to mow lawns or do the laundry or pull weeds or paint the garage because of bad grades - or in penance for the neighbor’s broken window Dad has to replace - to reinforce to the child that is their life if they don’t make good grades or act inappropriately in social settings.
Negative reinforcement is a technique that’s been used in military bootcamps for thousands of years with very effective results. It’s followed by building self-confidence while consistently reinforcing personal accountability. And that creates a balanced ego. The combination has worked to produce a millions of centered and mature individuals.