You are doing the right thing! But as you said, can be very difficult especially if other siblings don’t help.
We have/had a lawyer who insisted that my parents set up a "Care Agreement" with my sibling. Sib received a paycheck, took out/paid taxes, SS, Medicare, etc. Now there is an employment record PLUS my dad, bless his heart, was helping sibling out, but did not recognize just what care involved and that is was worth A GREAT DEAL.
He always said sib was caring for my mom, not recognizing that HE needed care as well.
Yes, the care given is not just physical work but emotionally draining. It’s not easy to daily and up close watch your parents decline...and did I mention daily and up close?
Some folks who’ve never done it may make light of it, brush it off as not that difficult. But that just shows their complete lack of understanding (and probably compassion).
I’m glad your sister was paid, that was helpful. What she did was worth far more than a paycheck! I’m glad you recognize that.