So...sex with cookware?
You mean you've never had the Aunt Jemima treatment?
That, or a trip to the first church of appliantology.
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Token_of_My_Extreme&ved=2ahUKEwiv1db1qpPmAhUIrp4KHVaVAccQFjALegQIAhAB&usg=AOvVaw1_AsakuEZtrlQ9Y4rLKKI-