Don’t forget another of my personal favorites:
The Ocean ate my global warming.
No really! It seems the ocean absorbs carbon dioxide! Who knew? It turns out there are these things called “carbon sinks” that absorb a massive amount of CO2 which we climate scientists knew absolutely nothing about until our models failed miserably. It’s OK. We’ve got it now. We have all the answers....this time. You can trust us and heed our words when we tell you to spend tens of trillions of dollars on this thing. Oh we can’t actually y’know, prove it via the scientific method. But this is our opinion. So trust us! I mean it!
Without going back to research it I cannot remember the exact numbers. But the gist of it is human activity is contributing an extremely small percentage of the carbon dioxide that is generated every year naturally.
That percentage is statistically insignificant. Were we to destroy much of the human race and cut that statistically insignificant percentage in half, it would have no effect whatsoever.
In other words if the tiny amount of carbon dioxide that we contribute is enough to tip the scales, then we may as well bend over and kiss our asses goodbye. Because we would essentially have to wipe out the human race and that itself would not change the CO2 in the atmosphere significantly.
Yep. Trust them. The science is settled. You betcha!