Reminds me of when I was in 4th grade. The teacher was strict, yet calm and kind nature, so I thought, or at least until Sheila, a new girl, an army brat, who previously lived in Kansas, joined the class. The teacher introduced her to the class and then asked her a question something like, “So, Sheila, you used to live in Kansas.” Sheila answered, “Yes, ma’am, I used to live in Kansas.” Uh, oh! The teacher, Miss D., who was an older, unmarried woman, who my aunt had had for her 4th grade teacher 12 years previously and who was a woman that at some point in time might have been referred to as a spinster or a biddy, suddenly became enraged. She shrieked “What did you call me?” Sheila, looking scared and confused answered something like “Ma’am. I called you ma’am, ma’am.” Miss D. “How dare you? Don’t you ever call me or anyone else ma’am that is rude and sounds like you are sassing me. I won’t stand for it.” Wow! We all sat there wondering where did this come from. I could see if it was one of us Yankee kids saying “Yes, ma’am.” but a kid from Kansas, where this was probably polite, how would she know (we were rude) didn’t use such terminology. Sheila, said something like “Sorry, I didn’t know I’m not suppose to say ma’am. Where I lived in Kansas, I would be in trouble if I didn’t say “Yes, ma’am.” Miss D: “Well you don’t live there anymore. You live here and you are going to learn to do things the right way.” Wow! I’m sitting there thinking thinking ????? Why did the teach over react and why is this rude? I still don’t get it. Sheila moved away about a year later, but I still remember this moment and how sad I felt for her.
of course if us, Yankee kids, had called Ms. Dee, ma’am, it would have been to sass her, but obviously a kid from somewhere else had been taught it was a form of respect and didn’t deserve the reaction she got from the teacher all those years ago.