With all due respect, I read his entire post twice. He stated very clearly that they did not agree on political issues (Gay marriage was an example.) And then he goes on to say that he did not see him for the past two years of his life—while his brother was dying of ALS.
Tell me how your own brother’s dying of a horrible disease OVER YEARS does not overcome your difference on gay marriage?
And then he comes on FR and whines because his sister in law doesn’t want to see him now?
Re Read that.
And then imagine a post from the SIL saying how she had to deal with her husband’s slow, horrific death for the past two years. Cleaning spittle out of his throat. Inserting the feeding tube down to his stomach. Changing his diapers like a baby. Holding him while he cried because he could not die.
And then, her husband is dead—this guy shows up all broken down because his brother has died.
How you would answer that depends on whether or not you have done the dirty work for years and then had someone who was capable of helping out of love and compassion—show up all butt hurt because the sibling died. Imagine how that would make you feel.
Would you allow your brother’s illness and agonizing death overcome your personal opinions to help his wife and family. Here is a clue: THEY are HIS Family.
Our FRiend missed his opportunity to show his respect and love for his brother.
He missed that train.
He posted the article looking for opinions. We are not obligated to agree with him. I am not sorry I did not jump to his defense. But I have been on the other side of selfish siblings. They “could not help because it was too hard for them.” Tough. Life is hard. Get over yourself
What you know:
1. At least a part of the decision was made because of political differences.
What you don’t know:
1. The conversations that led to the estrangement.
2. The conversations by other siblings and mother that led to their estrangement.
3. The family dynamics and cultural differences that surround expectations and needs.
I was in a situation where my mother had a horrible illness and my siblings did little to help. This is not that. And you’re still an asshat who is reading your own story into this. And you owe an apology.