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My Stab At a Haiku Re What I See Happening In My State--Laughing OK, but Don't Flame Me, Please!

Posted on 04/27/2018 11:42:45 AM PDT by Be Careful

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To: Be Careful

As a refugee in GA from the oppression in Illinois, I take care in watching the people moving in. Every week near me an apartment building of over 100 apartments is finished construction and people moving in. Plenty of license plates from IL, MI, OH, PA, NJ and a few from other states North of GA.

These people are not inherently bad. They came here to work because this is where the jobs are. They are pro work, anti welfare. In inner city Atlanta precincts East of me that have people who moved in 3 to 5 years ago, those precincts voted 75-80% for Clinton. But they voted 55-60% for the white Republican candidate for mayor against a Black Democrat candidate who made party the #1 issue in her campaign. So they are swing voters who can be convinced.

Democrats cannot take them for granted and Republicans/Conservatives should not write them off. But the GA GOP does seem to write them off and assume that Republicans are wasting their time in this mixed mostly Black area.

Republicans writing them off and ignoring them will make them resent the Republican label. People don’t like to be slighted. We create our own problems.


21 posted on 04/27/2018 3:05:15 PM PDT by spintreebob
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To: Be Careful

Traditional haiku has 17 syllables, in three phrases of 5, 7, and 5.

Yours has 19, in phrases of 5, 7 and 7 syllables.

Also, trad haiku has a “cut”, where the ending presents a turn from the drift of the first part. Yours just goes on describing one image.

Keep trying, though.


22 posted on 04/27/2018 5:20:03 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (We're even doing the right thing for them. They just don't know it yet. --Donald Trump, CPAC '18)
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To: Hugin
California
Dems drunk with power run amok
Venezuela style

LOL-- perfect!

23 posted on 04/27/2018 5:21:33 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (We're even doing the right thing for them. They just don't know it yet. --Donald Trump, CPAC '18)
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To: Albion Wilde

One syllable too many in the second line unless you use an apostrophe to substitute for a vowel.


24 posted on 04/27/2018 5:22:55 PM PDT by Publius
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To: Hugin
(mine was wrong too)

When I read it, I unconsciously elided the last syllable of "power" with the single-syllable next word, "run", and it seemed the right number of beats -- they way some lyricists do in hymns: "pow'r." But I guess there's always room for purity in poetry, a very difficult art form to do well.

25 posted on 04/27/2018 5:27:43 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (We're even doing the right thing for them. They just don't know it yet. --Donald Trump, CPAC '18)
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To: Publius

See post 25 — we crossed in cyberspace.


26 posted on 04/27/2018 5:28:17 PM PDT by Albion Wilde (We're even doing the right thing for them. They just don't know it yet. --Donald Trump, CPAC '18)
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To: Albion Wilde

Great minds run in the same gutters — or something like that.


27 posted on 04/27/2018 5:28:58 PM PDT by Publius
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To: Albion Wilde

I entertained myself today because I came across a Haiku Generator app. It was hilarious to play around with it


28 posted on 04/27/2018 6:35:47 PM PDT by Be Careful
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To: Be Careful

On education,

Not a lost generation,

But a lost country.


29 posted on 04/28/2018 9:09:12 AM PDT by logi_cal869 (-cynicus-)
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