Finally, Holy Spirit eventually succeeded in helping him realize, life was too short to be sooooooo annoyed about sooooo many things--all the more so in closer relationships; work relationships; driving, etc.
Besides, he saw that most of the annoyed energy had virtually NOTHING to do with the issue at hand and almost everything to do with RAD (Attachment) issues and a raging deep inner need to be in !CONTROL!; have potent impact on his environment; feel 'good' about himself by virtue of being more 'perfect' (what a vain, impossible task THAT was!--which, said perfectionism, correlates with LESS success in life; less life satisfaction; less fulfilling relationships, less durable relationships, less status in study after study) etc. etc. etc.
And, after a couple of decades of doing therapy and teaching a LOT of folks, he'd discovered that what his profs said was usually, largely true--most people are extremely resistant to changing.
So here he was being all arrogantly energized trying to batter folks far and wide more into his image & sensibilities--to usually virtually zero effectiveness in achieving that goal. On top of that--folks did NOT love him more for said efforts on his part. That was true for him on FR, too.
He finally realized that life is just tooooooo short to waste that kind of energy on that type of futile and usually offensive-to-others goal. So he began to increasingly lay it aside--particularly out of that kind of motivation and in that kind of tone and attitude.
Perhaps, you are wasting far too much energy, focus, emotionality being compulsively addicted to being annoyed about so many inconsequential things.
Smell the flowers. Enjoy people as they are with their warts and all--in all their splendid variety, complexions, colors & unique flawed habits.
You're not likely to find them otherwise. You're certainly not likely to successfully conform them to your image and sensibilties.
And even if by some miracle, you succeeded in getting them to conform to 10 out of 12 of your 'higher priority' sensibilities, you'd find another 10 issues to get newly all fussed up about . . . and NOT to the delight of the other people involved.
Life is too short. People are too precious--WITH--all their flaws. Loving them as they are is too rewarding and productive to live life and relationships any other way.
imho.
See post number 69 for reply.