[Hardastarboard]

If your momma don't bother to pull the Marlboro out from between her lips while she's telling a state trooper to kiss her ass, you just might be a redneck.

LOLOLOL - My all time favorite one. Description perfectly fits a buddy of mine's mother in law.

[IronJack]

while she's telling a state trooper to kiss her ass

With a voice that sounds like she gargled with Jack Daniels ... because she did.