“There are very few Russians in Poland, or very few that would admit to it.”
There was a guy whose house was right on the Russia/Poland border. Both countries argued for years about whether the house was in Poland or Russia. Finally, the politicians agreed they would let the owner of the house decide. A delegation of politicians from both countries visited him and asked which country he preferred. He said Poland. The Russians asked “Why”. He replied he didn’t think he could survive the Russian winters.
I’ll be first to say that was really funny!