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Memo to parents: Your adult kids don't want your stuff
NOLA.com| The Times-Picayune ^ | April 11, 2016 | Marni Jameson

Posted on 04/14/2016 12:27:24 PM PDT by metmom

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To: metmom

I bought a rather large bed when I moved into my apartment, which required some gluing for the frame. I’m going to be kicking myself when it’s time to move. Should have stuck with the air mattress on the floor.


21 posted on 04/14/2016 12:42:12 PM PDT by Mr. Blond
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To: Ditter

Could you donate it to me instead?


22 posted on 04/14/2016 12:42:43 PM PDT by notdownwidems (Washington DC has become the enemy of free people everywhere)
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To: metmom
This article is a bit overstated. Children may or may not want their parents stuff. When we settled my parents small estate, the grown children and all the grand kids were each allowed to select items that had memories for them, or for whatever reason they wanted the items. Quite a lot of furniture and mementos were distributed. The remainder were donated.
23 posted on 04/14/2016 12:43:36 PM PDT by LOC1 (We need a new President.)
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To: metmom

Solution? To bring back a slogan from the 60s:

Burn, baby, burn!


24 posted on 04/14/2016 12:44:53 PM PDT by GreyFriar (Spearhead - 3rd Armored Division 75-78 & 83-87)
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To: metmom

My parents are in their 80’s and they asked each of us what we wanted. I mentioned a few sentimental things and perhaps one (or more) of my dad’s guns. Other than that just leave what they think I would want.

I’ve already got memories!


25 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:16 PM PDT by rfreedom4u (The root word of vigilante is vigilant!)
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To: metmom

Don’t know.

My mom’s house is 100% authentic mid-century modern.

Spudnick chrome lamps.

Leather furniture with chrome legs.

1960s contemporary abstract wool rugs.

Several really nice Picasso lithographs (original, hand-signed ones — probably worth more than her house) and just a general great collection of original Cubist art.

I hated it as a kid.

It’s now so unhip, it’s become super cool again.


26 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:24 PM PDT by MeanWestTexan (Beware Obama's Reichstag Fire.)
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To: metmom

To be honest, I don’t want a lot of my stuff, either.

But when it comes to papers, I dislike the pain of sorting through, and figuring out what to keep, and what to throw away.

In some ways, I’m glad my mom kept stuff. She recently sent me a couple of newspaper clippings that had my different honor rolls and high school accomplishments. But on one of the was also was also the accomplishments of a friend who unfortunately passed away in her mid-20’s from cancer. It was a good reminder of those I have lost over the years.


27 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:34 PM PDT by kosciusko51
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To: sheana

STUFF

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvgN5gCuLac


28 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:36 PM PDT by CGASMIA68
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To: Tax-chick

The thing that’s hard is that good money was spent on a lot of the stuff and much of it is very high quality.

But you’re right. Kids these days don’t want the china and silver and I keep hearing that.

However, should the economy collapse, it may be a different story.

The problem is the junk, all the overpriced artwork and collectables, and VASES! My mi-i-l had vases coming out of her ears and NOBODY wants them.

I’m hoping to have a garage sale and get some reimbursement for all the time I put in.


29 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:43 PM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: metmom

Haha, this is spot on. My in-laws used to drop off anything they no longer wanted. It made for a lot of dump runs for me.


30 posted on 04/14/2016 12:45:57 PM PDT by Straight Vermonter (Posting from deep behind the Maple Curtain.)
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To: metmom

My parents decided on their own to down-size from a small farm to a house in a retirement community.

Needless to say, we were blessed to receive a bunch of really good stuff ... tools, equipment, even work clothes and fishing gear. We were glad to get a lot of this stuff.

My daughter and I, though, were tasked with going through my Grandma’s stuff, which my mom put in with her stuff, and never touched for 15 years since her mom passed. Too painful.

That was an adventure: A family Bible in German; Grandma’s artwork and letters from her fellow flapper college friends; and 60 years worth of diaries.

We also got some pretty useful kitchen ware.

My folks are still going through their stuff. We were proud of them for taking care of this themselves, while they were in good health (84 and 80 at the time) and able to make these decisions on their own.

My dad had weird collections that we would have sold for pennies on the dollar at a farm sale, but he found other people interested in this same weird stuff and did well.

Take away point: Elders, make plans for your stuff while you are healthy and in control. To everyone: Photos and diaries are some of the best stuff.


31 posted on 04/14/2016 12:46:15 PM PDT by Cloverfarm (Hail, hail to old Purdue ...)
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To: riverrunner

I have it on good authority that your kids don’t want your gun collection. Feel free to adopt me, I’ll take it off your hands.


32 posted on 04/14/2016 12:46:28 PM PDT by Wyrd bið ful aræd (Don't Tread On Me)
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To: notdownwidems

No.


33 posted on 04/14/2016 12:46:40 PM PDT by Ditter (God Bless Texas!)
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To: Ditter

I have seen parents deny their loving and responsible children their inheritance. What a great thing to do. Destroys a legacy for multiple generations.


34 posted on 04/14/2016 12:46:53 PM PDT by cornfedcowboy
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To: Farmer Dean

We are doing the same.

I saw my ex DIL sell all of her mother’s beautiful jewelry for pennies years ago. The current DIL is cut from the same cloth.

No way they get my junk. BTW, I have good junk. Their loss.


35 posted on 04/14/2016 12:47:08 PM PDT by Busta Rhymes
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To: Ditter

I love my mother...but i don’t want her money or things she has gathered through the years... I want her to enjoy her things and spend all of her money before she dies...is that wrong? I have the things i cherish from her now...but every family can’t continue to take everything from generation to generation...there is a space limit....I have no room for furniture or knicknacks...I have explained this to my mother and she understands.


36 posted on 04/14/2016 12:47:22 PM PDT by chasio649
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To: metmom

Went through this.....twice.

As people age, they become very afraid. They become afraid that they will have no power or authority. Their stuff makes them feel like they have power.

My Dad turned cash into stuff he liked. This included belt buckles and gems.

When he passed, we had to sell those items. We were not experts in belt buckles or gems. He paid retail for these things.

People will buy them, but they use my favorite retailer saying when they buy.

“I can’t pay that much! I have to be able to make money, too!”

Cash is easily divided.


37 posted on 04/14/2016 12:47:28 PM PDT by blueunicorn6 ("A crack shot and a good dancer")
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To: Dilbert San Diego
The situation is that grandparents and parents live in their houses full of furniture and assorted items. The children and grandchildren have grown up and have their homes, which are full of furniture and odds and ends.

I see that as exactly the problem.

Unless you plan on inheriting the stuff, you have to have beds and tables and dishes, etc. Then when someone dies, nobody wants the china and crystal cause they already have stuff to eat off of and drink out of.

Plus, stuff like that is pretentious and kids these days are not so formal and status oriented.

38 posted on 04/14/2016 12:48:20 PM PDT by metmom (...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith...)
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To: Ditter
I guess you don’t want my money either, I’ll donate it all to animal rescue.

(If you were my mother), I'm fine with that. I love animals, too, and I've been self-supporting for 30 years.

39 posted on 04/14/2016 12:48:24 PM PDT by Tax-chick ("The world is full of wonder, but you see it only if you look." ~NicknamedBob)
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To: metmom

My experience exactly!
I’m giving all my 100 plus yo furniture - been in my family - to an antique dealer who has storage. I’m giving it to him. I’m old and can’t go to the trouble of selling.

The man is good and helps me around house.


40 posted on 04/14/2016 12:48:47 PM PDT by ncpatriot
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