It’s a list of mandated Consumer Warnings before stickly labels were invented.
Stuff like:
Not safe for squires under the age of ten
Don’t raise the blade above the head in a lighting storm, serious injury or death may occur
La Belle Dame du Lac Smithy, Ltd. makes no warranty as to longevity of kingdoms acquired by the use of this product. The use of the product by bastard sons of the original owner is strictly prohibited and said warranty does not extend to subsequent owners.
Always make sure the hilt lock is securely engaged when children and serfs are present
In the event of product failure, securely wrap product in horse hair blanket and have courier deliver to:
Lady of The Lake
Consumer Relations Department
Blade has sharp edges, take care when using.