Posted on 05/31/2015 7:05:35 PM PDT by rickmichaels
It might be safe to go in the water now.
Monday marks the 40th anniversary of the release of Jaws, director Steven Spielbergs tale of a great white shark terrorizing a picturesque seaside town. Its a bona fide classic, deserving of all the praise it gets.
But its also something of a relic, a throwback to a simpler time in moviemaking when we were less cynical and more easily frightened. For all the monster movie remakes being trotted out this decade, its actually not surprising we havent seen Jaws sequel since 1987s Jaws: The Revenge (and not just because that movie was astoundingly, impossibly awful.)
As much as we love Jaws, here are five reasons it would fail if it were to be made today.
1. Audiences have no patience
In adapting Peter Benchleys novel for the big screen, Spielberg took his time creating characters we cared about and a world we could believe in, then slowly ratcheted up the tension and terror. We dont get a clear look at the shark in Jaws until more than halfway through the film, and that just wouldnt fly today. There are some exceptions Cloverfield, Super 8 and last years Godzilla come to mind but for the most part, modern audiences hate waiting to see a monster movies main attraction.
2. Less is no longer more
For a movie about a giant man-eating shark, Jaws spends very little time only four minutes in total showing the beast on screen. Again, a handful of modern monster movies have gotten away with this, but even last years otherwise solid Godzilla enraged some fans with how little screen time its radioactive lizard got. Doing a killer shark movie with only four minutes of killer shark in it would be box office suicide in 2015.
3. Digital effects would ruin it
Spielberg famously had endless problems with his mechanical shark prop, but the final result on screen was an actual, physical presence, giving the actors something to react to. A movie like Jaws wouldnt be made today without reliance on computer-generated effects, and our eyes would immediately know that what were seeing isnt real, diminishing its fear factor. Thats why you can bet the all-digital dinos of Jurassic World just arent going to have the same impact as the massive robotic T-rex in Jurassic Park.
4. No one goes swimming anymore
OK, thats an exaggeration. But its true that summer beach vacations just arent the tradition they once were. Parents and kids alike are burdened with more commitments and less free time, and Griswold-style family trips are becoming a relative rarity. A shark terrorizing a seaside resort wouldnt resonate the same way it did in 1975 most of us would shrug and say, Who has time to go to the beach?
5. Sharks have jumped the shark
Maybe it began with a computer-generated shark making a meal of Samuel L. Jackson in 1999s Deep Blue Sea, or maybe it was even earlier than that. But sharks have gone from being a primal menace to a punchline. Imagine trying to make a serious, scary killer shark movie in the wake of Sharknado. Youd need more than just a bigger boat.
An audience falls under the spell of a TRUE teller of tales and will gladly go where he takes them.
The author doesn't seem to realize that the problem today lies with the teller of the tale. If he is a mere technician then no he won't know how to structure his story to bring his audience along.
Such as two-headed sharks....
...and the mayor stood to benefit from a real estate developmemt deal. Glad they left that out, too.
Greenpeace and allied organizations would be picketing the movie as being biased against sharks, and promoting the hunting of same, despite what happened to Quint.
But I do have a couple of friends who are heading up for a Bay Bridge swim in a couple of weeks and the alert didn't quite sit well with them. :-)
CGI has ruined the Superhero genre, Sci-Fi, monster and horror Flicks AND Disney.
I hate CGI.
I would rather watch Star Trek TOS than any of the new Star Treks.
I would rather watch the First (unadulterated” Star wars than any of the Junky “Pre-quels”.
I would rather watch the first “Superman” than the more recent ones.
I would rather watch “Snow White and the seven Dwarves” than “Frozen”.
I love the art of Special Effects and stunt work that made Classic movies so magical.
I hate that every movie that has come out recently is all visual noice.
But that’s just me. I guess I’m just old fashioned, and ymmv.
I saw this comment on social media. Sigh.
“This stupid f** movie has created an irrational fear in the global population of a beautiful apex oceanic predator that rarely feeds on humans. This fear is lending itself to the demolition of sharks for shark fin soup, to the point that the oceanic ecosystem (which produces 70% of your oxygen) is being disrupted.
There is zero guarantee that the new oceanic balance after sharks are eliminated will produce the same amount of O2. So, f** this movie and celebrating it.”
As in:
or, as a Barracuda get into the act:
"Sharktopus vs. Pteracuda"
where in James Fra
or, coming out this July: "Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf"
And let's not forget the forgettable 1981 ripoff
wherein "James Franciscus tries to save hundreds of swimmers in a coastal resort after a Great White Shark starts terrorizing the area."
THANK YOU
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