There was an SNL skit where the villians were on The Tonight Show saying those exact things. Mike Myers played the bald SPECTRE character with the white cat (best one to me was Donald Pleasence).
Myers used this as his “Dr. Evil” character in the Austin Powers movies.
The Top 100 Things I’d Do
If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord
http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html