I have quoted Buford T. Justice to my kids before.
Buford T. Justice:
“There ain’t no way, NO WAY that you could have ever come from my loins. When we get home the first thing I’m gonna do is punch yo’ mama in the mouth.”
“And don’t go home, don’t go to eat, and don’t play with yourself. It wouldn’t look nice on my highway. Oh, you can think about it, but don’t do it.”