I love those calls. Perfect opportunity for split personalities to come out and play.
Steven, the gay, is probably my favorite. Its amazing the ridiculous thing you can say to someone with that gay lisp. It becomes a challenge to see how sick, how awful, how perverse the comments get before they hang up.
I tell them that the person they want to speak to is DEAD,
and then I start screaming and sobbing at the top of my lungs.
They don’t call back.