Ahhh...I will quote the Protestant pastor who was giving advice to the married sailors on my navy ship as we approached San Diego on our return trip from the Persian Gulf (including stops in the Philippines). I was single at the time.
“Some of you may have done some things you are embarrassed of or regret while deployed. Some of you may feel like you should tell your spouses what you did.
I would ask you, what good would that do now? What would telling your spouse accomplish? What are you trying to accomplish by telling your spouse?”
In short....the only person harmed right now...is the cheater. They are forced to live with theor actions. If they actually feel remorse and are no longer cheating....and there is no l dial reason for the child or non-parent to onow about the “one night stand”.....then telling everyone only ruins two or three more lives when only the cheating mother should be suffering.
Amen.
That would be my take. By ‘fessing up, the woman relieves her own guilt but potentially damages her marriage/family, her husband, and ALL children. For what purpose? If later there’s a valid reason to let the child know, hopefully s/he will be mature enough to handle the truth. Unfortunately, she made a stupid mistake and she will have to live with the consequences, not make others suffer along with her.