Here are a couple of solutions:
First, start your higher education at a community college—tutition is often one-third that of state-run, four-year schools and a fraction of private institutions. Believe it or not, you can actually work your way through a community college, as long as you don’t also need a luxury apartment, new car and designer wardrobe.
Option #2: ROTC scholarship. Tuition and books are covered by Uncle Sam, in return for your service as a military officer after college. Most schools also throw in a room and board scholarship for students enrolled on a ROTC scholarship and there’s a modest living stipend, too.
Option #3. Enlist in the military after high school. You get a place to live, a food allowance, and a full-time salary along with tuition assistance (up to $4500 a year). Start your college with TA, then finish up after your enlistment on the GI Bill.
That's the advice I give the many young people I know, as well. If they're after a four-year degree, they can go to the community college for two years, live at home with Mom and Dad, and then transfer to State U. It's where you go to graduate school that makes the real difference.
As far as the rest of your advice: it's good for some people, but not everybody has the ability to serve in the military. Some young women can deal with it, but many are not physically suited to boot camp.