My brother was killed on Okinawa in April 1945. In Aug. 1945 I was about 7th in line at the supply warehouse to get my battle gear on Leyte for the invasion of Japan. I can truly say I had mixed emotions when a Lt. came out and told us to go back to our tents as the fighting was over. One thought was that even knowing the likelihood of death as a infantry man I would never get the opportunity to avenge my brothers death; on another thought was that I should be glad that as a 19 year old I would be certain to live some more years to go back to college as my brother expressed for/to me. It took a few more years to reconcile the feelings and I did get my university degree. War is hell even if your just a substitute on the sidelines.
My condolences for the loss of your brother. My thanks to him and you for my freedom.