LOL!
You sound like me my first 40 years. I'd like to encourage you to avoid the bumping your head off various walls - like a pinball - and to take the Bible literally ... but I know if I was hearing this claim years ago - I wouldn't take the advice. I hope you catch on quicker than I did.
My father is a preacher so I did take it literally for about 10 years, too long by my estimation. The bumping my head off walls of logic (or illogic) is enlightening, not frightening.