Athenian soldier to Spartan Herald:
Hey why are you bent over like a man trying to light a match in the wind? What is that thing poking out of your cloak? My god, are you a man or Priapus?
Spartan Herald to Athenian: Fool! That is a Spartan message rod.
I can’t remember any more.
Surely you are hiding a spear under your cloak!