Well I sure as hell hope they are, because there's no way I want to outlive my kids. Not only because it's not the normal cycle of life, but also because I don't want to have to clean out their apartments. My oldest son never throws anything away, and my youngest son is a slob. I've already told him that if he dies before me, I'm not cleaning his apartment out, but giving him a Viking funeral by setting his place on fire with him in it.
That means killing them when you die... I’m not sure I can get 100% on board with that, but it’s your call. Any pets still alive when I croak will go to someone who will love them.
I can relate to the story of your younger son.
I think there is some confusion...you want to cremate your cats with you?