[Yossarian]

I want tight control over this thing - I'll happily live with an incomplete knowledge of how "everything works" to make sure we don't cause a physics calamity here on Earth.

Most discoveries in science come not from someone saying "Eureka!", they come from a scientist saying "What the...". I don't want a WTF moment coming from such a high-energy collision, thank you very much.

[BenLurkin]

You mean like this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Xrpj5GTFV4