[hecticskeptic]

Check post 30… I think that RegulatorCountry said it well but let me elaborate on one point. The article doesn’t make a statement on why the men who are supposedly doing more housework are doing it and this is critical for understanding anything to do with this issue. Let me list a few options… 1. They have made a deal with their wife. I’ll do this if you do that ((in the broad scope of marriages, the deal making could theoretically include anything but no doubt for some people, sex could be part of it). 2. Some of the men may be doing the housework with the idea that they ‘are earning browny points that can be turned into sexual favours’. Thus even if there was no deal (implied or otherwise), doing the housework becomes equated with sexual favours. 3. The men doing the housework see a need in the household to contribute in that area and are simply stepping up to the plate to fulfil it….. and are doing so without any preconditions or suppositions of any sort attached to it. Take your pick at the reason…they see that their wife is too tired to do it, they enjoy doing it (and perhaps know that is not something that the wife likes or perhaps he secretly is aware that she generally does a poor job at it), he is doing it simply because that is the way the couple has worked out the division of duties in their household, he is doing it because his wife is sick, she is too busy….endless reasons. It doesn’t really matter what the reason is or even if the reason is rooted in concepts of love and/or duty. If the man is doing the housework because of any reason in No 3, those are all good and honourable reasons for doing it. If it is for any reason that looks like it could fall under 1 or 2, then this means sex is being exchanged for goods, services or some other forms of tangible exchange… and I would put it to you that this always will lead to failure in marriage because it is not based on what it should be……and in fact, it is based on something more akin to prostitution. And failure in marriage certainly if nothing else leads to reduced sex. So…. no surprise. There is only one reason why a man should get sex in a marriage… because he is the husband. This is only one reason why a woman should get sex in a marriage… because she is the wife.

[ctdonath2]

Was looking for your #3 in there. Sometimes he does the housework out of love, so accusing “prostitution” may be misplaced. So why might a man in that scenario “get less”? ...especially when some women declare “if my man did that, I’d be giving him a lot!”