You’ll shoot your eye out, kid.
The tax assessor wanted to visit Farmer Joe's farm. Knowing that assessments never fail to go up, Farmer Joe refused him entry. The assessor insisted he could get a warrant. Farmer Joe didn't budge.
Several hours later, the assessor returned and showed Farmer Joe a piece of paper. "This paper," the assessor informed him, "gives me the authority to go anywhere on your farm I please."
Farmer Joe said, "Be my guest. The pasture's unlocked."
So, the assessor went out and entered the pasture to begin his assessment. He was about halfway to the barn when he heard a snort emanating from its dark, cavernous interior. The assessor froze in his tracks. It was too late, for the bull had espied him and was now determined to run him into the ground. The assessor turned and ran toward the opposite side of the field. He noticed Farmer Joe leaning calmly against the fence and screamed, "Do something!!!!"
Farmer Joe laconically replied, "Just show him your paper."