[ArGee]

Caught ya. He can't have BBQ pulled Porkofiev and Prokoffee-ev in the same menu.

Didn't actually expect me to read all that, didja?

You can't be Bach. Schwarzenegger gets to be Bach. You have to be Handel.

[ArGee]

I always wanted to produce my own film based on the Gospels. But I never liked those namby-pamby girly-men they keep finding to play Jesus. Jesus was a carpenter. In those days a carpenter would have had to be pretty strong, which is also supported by him driving everyone out of the Temple and turning over those tables without being challenged. He must have been a pretty big guy.

I'm thinking Arnold Schwarzenegger. I think he'd make a great Jesus. And then, right before he dies on the cross, he can say, "Ah'll be bahk."

Sort of gets ya', right here, dodn't it?

[absolootezer0]

ah ha! top this one! (from marx brothers’ animal crackers)

Spaulding: What do you fellas get an hour?
Ravelli: For playing, we get-a ten dollars an hour.
Spaulding: I see. What do you get for not playing?
Ravelli: Twelve dollars an hour.
Spaulding: Well, clip me off a piece of that.
Ravelli: Now for rehearsing, we make special rate. That’s-a fifteen dollars an hour...That’s-a for rehearsing.
Spaulding: And what do you get for not rehearsing?
Ravelli: You couldn’t afford it. You see, if we don’t rehearse, we a-don’t play, and if we don’t play (he snaps his finger) - that runs into money.
Spaulding: How much would you want to run into an open manhole?
Ravelli: Just-a the cover charge! Ha, ha, ha.
Spaulding: Well, drop in some time.
Ravelli: Sewer.
Spaulding: Well, we cleaned that up pretty well.
Ravelli: Well, let’s see how-a we stand.
Spaulding: Flat-footed.
Ravelli: Yesterday, we didn’t come. (To Mrs. Rittenhouse) You remember, yesterday we didn’t come?
Spaulding: Oh, I remember.
Ravelli: Yes, that’s three hundred dollars.
Spaulding: Yesterday, you didn’t come, that’s three hundred dollars?
Ravelli: Yes, three hundred dollars.
Spaulding: Well, that’s reasonable. I can see that alright.
Ravelli: Now today, we did come. That’s-a (pause)..
Spaulding: That’s a hundred you owe us.
Ravelli: Hey, I bet I’m gonna lose on the deal. Tomorrow we leave. That’s worth about (pause)..
Spaulding: A million dollars.
Ravelli: Yeah, that’s alright for me, but I’ve got a partner.