My only marriage is like your second marriage. We started about 10-14 times a week, and now after 30 years and three kids, it's currently down to 5-7, I'm close to your age.
I've had friends whose marriages were like your first marriage, will similar final outcomes.
Guys, here's a clue: A woman who is deeply in love with you will also desire you. Second clue: if she's not willing to have a high enough frequency to keep you satisfied, if she's not willing to make an effort to make you happy, then she doesn't love you. If she's lost interest in sex with you, then divorce will follow, so you might as well talk to your lawyer now and make your plans.
Maybe. Do bear in mind that physical problems may prevent a woman from desiring a husband whom she truly does love. After childbirth and/or after menopause, sex can become quite painful, and the medication used to improve this situation has side effects like heart attack, stroke, and cancer. It's hard to force yourself to have sex when it hurts like mad and even causes damage to delicate tissues. It's harder still to choose to inflect potential death on yourself for the sake of having sex. I have seen many, many medical records and have heard from many patients that they are frustrated, they're unhappy, they know their husbands may leave them, but a prior history of cardiac problems or cancer precludes using hormones to fix the sexual pain. This is far more common than you'd think.
Problem is, there are men like that, too. Either their libido is the problem or they just got married to please their nagging mother or so as not to look gay to their boss, but don't really love their wife, or they are cheating and won't throw their wife a bone once in awhile.
And it's just not as easy for a woman with children to just get a divorce, change partners and dance. Especially with children, and especially if he is the larger breadwinner. Most men can get loose women and/or another wife at virtually any age; but most men do not want to marry a divorced woman over 35 with children; and most mothers do not want a mere shackup in front of the children.
People need to prepare for marriage much more carefully if they intend to have children. Every time I hear that old b.s., "children are flexible" with regard to joint custody and two sets of parents, I spit. That's because they don't know anything yet and they should be seeing a good moral example when they are forming their own value system. Kids shouldn't have to swallow their pain to accommodate their juvenile parents' demands for self-fulfillment, liberation, more bang for their buck or whatever.
By the way, PapaBear, this rant is not directed at you personally. Just sayin'.