Hopefully I'm not the only idiot who gets scammed because I was raised with Christian compassion.
Tell me your stories, I could use a good laugh.
Help the homeless by giving to or shopping the thrift stores of the Salvation Army, Goodwill and similar organizations. If you personally know someone in dire straits, then you can help them one-to-one, but many beggars are scammers.
I offered work to a homeless man and he refused. He said he could make more money holding his sign. When I told him he was “making” nothing he was merely taking handouts he said, “same thing”.
Why are you paying someone to be homeless?
If she looked as you describe her, I doubt she was going out for a steak dinner, had much more than a cardboard box to sleep in, or a long life expectancy. She may be nuts and probably doesn’t even have grandkids.
Hate to be that way but people like you described ruin it for people who really need help.
Most homeless asking for money are scamming you. And most have drug and alcohol issues.
When I am asked to “give” to these folks and always refuse. But I make a mental note and give $10 for every time I am asked to the Salvation Army.
He used to sit out in front of the Walmart in Roswell, NM with his dog and a sign. At that time he really did live under the bridge.
He could make $300.00 on a monday afternoon, more on the weekend, just a couple hours and then he was off to the dealer.
Thankfully he has been clean for almost 10 years now.
If you want to truly help someone, find a person you know or a program you trust and work that way. Anything else is like throwing money out the window, literally.
When I lived in Arizona, there was a reporter who investigated the “homeless” people with the cardboard signs on the corners and freeway off ramps around the valley. What he found was shocking to most people. The majority of the beggars were well-off, lived in nice homes, drove nice cars and were not destitute. He interviewed them anonymously and many were quite frank about why they did what they did. Some of the reasons they gave were: it was easy to get cash from people, they didn’t have to report it to the IRS, they didn’t have to punch a clock at a regular job, they found it easier to make a good living begging than than working like most people did. Many of them did quite well and reportedly made upwards to $75,000 a year begging on the street. They’re only expenses were driving and parking near their most lucrative locations, some old dirty clothes and the cardboard sign. No one ever checked whether they were at work or how hard they were working. The police never bothered them. They were left to their own devices to do as they pleased. Remember this the next time you feel compelled out of compassion to give money to a street beggar. The majority are nothing more than professional scammers and con artists.
Scammers are everywhere. One way to tell the true homeless is an unmistakable grundge on their skin. It isn’t that they smell, but they only get to “bathe” by using plain water and a paper towel. They have a definite “dark” tinge to their skin. They seldom have access to soap.
You are not an idiot. Please don’t beat yourself up. Christmas time is a perfect time to play on the sympathies of Christians.
I had someone scam me into supporting a whole family for Christmas one year. I found out this person play a pity card every Christmas season, and pretends she needs money for her children’s Christmas.
She will sucker others, and there is nothing anyone can do about it.
Just know that God knows the heart, and that you gave the money with love.
Now you know to use your discernment before giving. Some people spend so much more. Think of the filth that person has to live with, that is in their heart! Oh my- YUCK!
So, praise God for the lesson, and rejoice that He is watching over you.
You are not an idiot, you are a child of God. BIG difference. HUGE difference.
My husband and I were leaving WalMart when we drove past a young couple holding a small sign written in pen, so it was hard to read. They were out of gas and needed to get 100 mi down the road. He explained that he had gone up to DesMoines for a “sure thing” tech job, but when he and his wife arrived, they did not hire him after all. Then the car broke down and they spent most of their cash to fix it, and here they were.
We only had about $10 on us, so gave them that, then brought them to the gas station right there and filled them up using our debit card. It could have been a BS story, but that doesn’t matter to me. I have children, one has been VERY down on his luck in the past, and I hope somebody would do the same for *my* child. We were happy to help them.
I see them too, and give a few dollars. I’ve also bought food for people who said they were hungry and had them reject it.
But you never know. I was homeless too once for about a month. That’s why I give to them, but never more than a dollar or two. Instead, I give to our local community food bank and women’s shelter. I buy toys at the local toy store and drop them off for Toys For Tots because every child should get something nice for the holidays. I bring food to my animal shelter when I buy bulk. These charities I know will give to people who truly need it.
I had a couple of people approach me at a gas station at different times with the same story, they said they were trying to get somewhere and were out of gas (they were in a car).
I was feeling generous that day and gave them money, but afterwards I was PO’ed after realizing their story made no sense. They just asked at the right time when I didn’t feel like thinking.
One time in SF my then manager and I were walking down the street and a beggarly guy came up to us and I gave him a quarter. He then turns to my manager and says ‘and you sir, what about you? My beggar turned out to be a hustler simply selling his act and he’s not the only one. There’s so many of them everywhere it seems.
But my brother told me a story of when he was working in Baltimore City and was standing outside his workplace having a smoke. This homeless guy came up to my brother asking for change and my brother asked him “So why do you need money?” The scruffy guy looked my brother straight in the eye and said, “To tell you the honest truth man, I really need a drink”. My brother was so impressed with his honesty that he gave him a $10 bill, telling him not to spend it all on booze but to also get something to eat. He also pointed to the Catholic Church across the street and told him that they had a soup kitchen and also had regular AA meetings there. My brother BTW was not an alcoholic but had a good friend who got sober in AA.
Many years ago, early 1980’s, both my brother and his wife were out of work, were waiting for an unemployment check and didn’t know how they were going to make ends meet live alone how to have any sort of Christmas for their three young children. My husband and I were helping as much as we could but we, being newly married and struggling ourselves with me also having just lost my job at the time, could not do much except help them with some food.
But that Christmas Eve morning they found a great big box on their front porch filled with toys, wrapping paper and ribbons along with a crisp $100 bill. To this day they have no idea who their anonymous benefactor was; either a neighbor or a former co-worker or someone from their church who knew of their struggles. But every Christmas since, when my brother and his wife can afford to do so, they find a family in need in a similar circumstance through a neighbor, a friend of a friend, someone that one of their now adult kids know, someone from their Parish, etc. and they do the same thing and do so anonymously. I think now days it’s called “Paying it Forward”. They were so grateful for what someone did for them that they feel a need to do the same for someone else.
And if I should have prophecy and should know all mysteries, and all knowledge, and if I should have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
I was going to visit my Mother via Greyhound. Had a 4 hour layover in Chicago and I’d never been there so wandered around the downtown area for a bit.
Bought a skein of floss for the cross stitch project I was passing my bus-time on and then made my way to a cafe for dinner. It was misty with fog coming in off the lake and chilly.
A woman holding a toddler had two other children in tow and asked if i could help her. She said she’d lost her bus transfer and couldn’t get home. The children were clean but none had a coat or jacket. I asked her how much a bus transfer cost, she said $2. I gave her the 2 bucks, told her ‘God bless you’ and went into the cafe.
The waitress asked me what the woman had wanted, I told her, in disgust she said that the Mother probably makes a pretty good living asking for bus-xfer money.
As I ate I examined how I felt about probably being scammed and found I didn’t care. I’d sleep well that night, any guilt necessary belonged to the woman and it was possible she really was a stranded Mother.
Hey, don’t beat yourself up. The scammer in chief is back in office placed their by a scammer electorate.
I had one of the “I’m stuck out of town and need gas money” many years ago. I had my nephew with me. Was a bit of an uncomfortable conversation when I didn’t give to him, but that cleared up a week later when we saw him doing the same thing in another part of town (yeah, not another guy doing the same thing - but the same guy).
When ever we invite my brother and his wife over for dinner, I make them hold up a handmade sign that reads
WILL WORK FOR SHRIMP CREOLE while I take their picture.
Is that mean?
Down in Worcester MA the low life beggars are on just about every street corner. While I was waiting at a light I saw a beggar working the line of cars. He was walking up to each car with a very pronounced limp, the light changed and the limp suddenly disappeared.