I don't see that as having a lot to do with lesbianism. Straight kids put the "touch" on parents too and it can only continue as long as the parents allow it.
A quick example, I have a good friend, who retired about the same time I did 12 years ago. He was every bit as financially prepared as I was and he and his wife only had one child, a daughter who was sexually straight. Daughter has financially drained them over the years, she's 38 years old now, many times divorced and still tapping her parents rapidly decreasing funds, to the point that the parents, for the first time in many years have mortgaged their home.
He has asked me, "what can I do"? I tell him the easy part of the truth, that he has to let her fall....Advice that is much easier given, than taken. The part that I don't tell him, because it would not help matters at all, is that they and they alone created this harsh situation.
I have known daughter and parents since daughter was an infant and watched her parents give their only child everything her little heart desired. It continues to this day, only now there are two grand children involved for the daughter to use as "weapons", putting my friends in what they see as an impossible situation.
Didn't mean to write so much, this could have been some kind of vanity thread of its own.
To AUJenn - I'll pray for your situation and the family that's involved, this kind of situation has the potential of causing rifts in families.
I understand what you mean, but the niece was into drugs as well as being queer. I know straight kids that strap their parents when financial problems pop up. Our policy has been, don't lend money to family or friends.