I would have enjoyed some bacon with him before calling the police, or shooting him.
Well, yes, that is the natural instinct.
Shooting him.
Sharing YOUR bacon with him is an option I would (probably) not have partaken in...then again, we are talking about bacon-maybe one or two pieces before letting him assume room temperature.
I guess it depends on what the fridge has to offer. If he burned the bacon that would get me more pissed than normal.
Move him out of the kitchen before you shoot him. Food is very sensitive, it picks up emotions.
Agree with having a nice breakfast with bacon and eggs with him. Wow, a man who knows his way around the kitchen. Maybe he’s just misunderstood. Naw, hold the gun on him while you eat all the bacon and then do your best impression of Dirty Harry by asking if he feels lucky. His answer would enable you to better word your 911 call.